Things to do Today :

1. Get up.

2. Survive.

3. Go back to bed.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

My I-Cant-Clutch-Any-Ideas-Anymore Assignment

This one is by the Writing teacher. My Passion.

“I’m not a different brand, just a different model.” Or should it be “I’m not a different colour, just a different shade.” Which is more apposite? What I am trying to say is just parallel. Sometimes, when I just want to make a complete line of libretto, it is like squeezing out a three note melody.
As I stated in my previous essay, my general interests are music and art. But I prefer in saying the major one is music, because I know I spend more time on tunes rather than images and colours. Hence I would say music is my passion; the air that I breathe. Not just the simple music, it is everything that has to do with the particular entertainment. I made it as a part of my life since I was very young. My mother told me, I would just sing my lungs out in the public, or just in the middle of crowded people in the shopping complex every time hear a familiar song. I just took it easy, without hesitation, no disgrace, “And IIIIIIII, will always, loooove youuuuuu.” That was by Whitney Houston and I was five. My audience would just look and be amazed.
This passion of music is not only mine. It runs in the family. The person whom exposed us to music was my father. He taught us to listen to classic rock bands such as Queen and Beatles. When it comes to instruments, the guitar is the main subject. I have Carlos Santana and the late Jimi Hendrix as my idols. My mother on the other hand taught us to listen to Nursery Rhymes. She plays the piano and we all four siblings inherited that. I prefer playing the guitar because we all can play it with many different positions. Who plays the piano while one is lying on the bed? We have a few types of instrument at home. They are bongos, violins, keyboards, two sets of drums and etcetera. Whether we know how to or not, we just play.
The first ever person whom I know, wrote a song spontaneously, complete with melody, in front of my bare eyes, was my father as well. He is such an inspiration. I was amazed and the song was astounding. The song was funny though because it was about his four children and their attitudes. He just had his acoustic guitar. Then my brother followed his steps. He built a band of his own, and produces songs of technical grunge genre. I do composing too, but then I have vague inspired mind. I have done just three songs, and if one listens to them, he or she will know they are mine, because they are just typical and you could say they are parallel to another.
I really have to meet the counsellor of the writer’s block company.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Stupid Coward Gray Satria

He was making his left corner from our right. He was extremely fast. We know that what he was doing was sooooo wrong. Nobody can speed up while making turns! As I gave him my first sight, recklessly, I shouted, “Ha! Laju lagi! Laju lagi!” Suddenly he hit 75% on his break, and gave us a pretty dirty look. Then Akak said, “Tingkap dia buka la, Fathiyah.” (Lantak apa aku. Kalau tak puas hati, jom gaduh. Apa dia buat tu memang salah kan)I just made a blur look staring while controlling the extremely hot boiling blood while looking at his car. I swear to God, if anything happens to my family, I’ll kick his ass on the spot. Then Mak said, “Dia tak berani dowh nak turun.” He didn’t do anything else but just stared back over his left shoulder! Then we went off into the restaurant.

Ingat naik kereta satria kapok tu terror sangat? Dah la botak. Hentak sikit kepala dah nampak benjol. Bodoh pakai shades malam malam.

We just laughed all the way to realize that he is a big fat coward.

Thursday, January 22, 2009


Holidays are boring. I could hate holidays at times. We only relax. That’s it! No studies, no research, or term papers to be done yada yada yada. I’m so glad I am having classes now; rushing, rushing, rushing. But I am tired. :(

Saturday, January 17, 2009

The 5 am Brain Tormenting

No one ever gave a second thought about liking him. We never mind to look at his bad side because no one ever really cares. I said “enough with histories.” But why is he still on my mind? It was years ago when I was still a teenager. Very plain and naive. I can’t have these dreams and thoughts about you anymore. Please go away. Every other girls like you, I know most of them are, but stop messing around in my head, please.

I am such a bad person. :(

Unwanted Delusions 2 cont'd

Oh yea. About several pairs of wedding couples there, Malay ones; one of the brides was faceless.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Unwanted Delusions 2

Lost soul. My soul. I was dead, but half awake. The people bathed me, combed my hair, and braided it; I was wearing white trousers and long sleeved white t-shirt. I just could see everything. I could even make a choice. To stay, or to go. Most people would want to go because of the unbearable future sins they have to face. I made mine, and I stayed. I remember saying this to the light, “Tak apa lah. Pahala tak cukup lagi.” The minute the words came out completely out of my mouth, I sat, and got up, and walked away. “You might not be with us now.”

Scary nurses. Complete and perfect uniform they were wearing. But somehow they tend to chase patients down and over volcano like mountains and vomit acids on their faces. I was one of the victims but I was left behind. Couldn’t they see me?

I forgot this one.